i called my Doctor, Dr Lederman not David Letterman to ask a question? or two?
I informed him that my hot flashes started about 6 weeks ago and i havent had a period since i saw him - Feb- March. I informed him that i could tolerate the flashes during the day and that I had infact tested positive for Epstein Barr and getting up at night is an interference with my sleep.
I told him i was on Estarvan and a host of herbal remedies. He doesnt suggest Estrogen Replacement and its not what i wanted. He will send me brochure on alternatives to take..
he told me he would not give me Provera to jump start my period, like he had in the past because it sounds like MENOPAUSE
i put the phone down and its like those were the dreaded words i didnt want to hear.
MENOPAUSE.. my thoughts are 'im too young"
I am no longer too young, I am 45 years old.
i know not getting a period signifies the end of my child bearing years and mourning not having a child hits me every once in a while, though i wanted a child but the circumstances werent right for me
I am not really ready to do it alone nor would i so i probably will not experience child birth or birthing my child but i have parenting more children than most and get to go home to peace and quiet
its okay that i treat my neices to gifts when it isnt their birthday or celebrate birthdays in threes. These are the children that i can nurture, spoil, hang out with, parent, care for and care about and buy gifts and have sleep overs
i didnt want to hear those words, I THINK its menopause. I have debated about blogging about the lack of period but decided that Its worse not to talk about it...or write about it- it prepetuates the myths that aging and losing my period should not be talked about..
i do wish this started at a later age but i cant control that ... i can just be
