Sunday, July 05, 2009
my father loses all dignity when my nieces are around. My mother refuses to be photographed, my father allows us to dress him up and take silly pictures. My father has been in tremendous pain for the last few years. He is desperately in need of a knee replacement. He will get a new knee tomorrow.
My father has survived many heart attacks, angioplasty, stints, pacemaker, defibrillator which he has now. He has survived prostate cancer and jaundice and Hep C. He will be fine and he will have a greater quality of life.
My dad was born in the town where I grew up. He has lived in the house we grew up since he was 3. My dad spent most of his childhood raising himself or being raised by assorted members of the community. My grandparents spent their energy on their business or on my grandfather's cancer. My father was born when his oldest brother was almost 20 and his sister was a teen. He was a lost child in many ways.
He finished high school and wanted to learn a trade. Plumbing, refrigeration etc. His family thought that trade school was not becoming or expected from a Jewish Family so he went to sell jewels and then opener his own store. Prior to that He spent 4 years serving in Korea.
My father met and fell totally in love with my mom. She settled for the jewish man who was a good provider and good man. I am not sure that she was in love with him but came to love him. My father cherished his family and was responsible for the chores of child raising like morning diapers and getting us off to school. My father is calm man when it comes to logical, common sense things. He tends not to spend too much time on fantasy, nonsensical stuff or head games as he calls it. He is straight forward and values people who are the same. He tends to focus on business and things related to financial matters are important. he has lots of rules around those types of things. He always has multiple plans to make sure that there are no ways for things to so wrong. He is a planner and a double planner.
My father is like Charlie Brown in many ways. He always had the football pulled out from underneath him. He has managed to get what he wanted from life. But not without a struggle or bumps. My dad owned his own business for many years and then in the decline of MAIN STREET America, he chose to close his business. During the years that he had his store, he and my mom would work Holiday Season for long hours to make up for many slow months. He was working late nights on Thursday Friday and Saturday but took Wedneday afternoon off. Those afternoons were spent at the beach or pool. Sundays were spent with relatives, or at parks, beaches or long drives around new england. We ate out on those days.
My dad switched jobs at age 48 where he went to work for polaroid as a worker on the assembly line. He tried to work for Zales Jeweler or Jordan's fine jewelry department before he gave up that part of his vocation. His experience allowed him to move into camera repair and then customer service. He retired working for the President of Polaroid directly. He wrote customer service letters and took calls from the President's office.
My father retired and worked for Bob Stores while my mom worked. He acquired a small two bedroom condo in Florida and loves to spend his winter's there. He goes to the cultural center and gets tickets for entertainment and loves winter spring league baseball.
My father is a quite man who listens more than talks. The love of his life, my mom, his family and his grand children. He would do anything in his power for them. He was able to get them video tapes, school supplies and their favorite foods. He spent time playing games and is attentive to them.
My father will have a new knee tomorrow and will have a quality of life that is better than the pain and hobbling that he is going through now. He really cannot manage.
he will not be able to drive for himself for 6 weeks. He will feel that he is stuck in the house. He is nervous my mom will not be around if he needs her. He was upset at the Physical Therapy orientation because he didnt get enough individualized attention. He had to sit through other people's complaints and felt the PT orientation was too negative. He was able to locate a Rehab where is comfortable and a doctor he likes. He almost cancelled his operation due to the Physical Therapist who met with him a group.
Dad will have a better quality of life after he recovers but it all starts or ends tomorrow. The bad knee will be gone and its pain and impairment. A new knee will be sore but with time, the impairment will be gone and his quality of life will improve.
Good luck dad