Wednesday, May 11, 2005

Bin ladin's head on a pike and on dry ice? where will they get dry ice in Afganistan

Transcript for May 8
Guests: Gary Schroen, former senior CIA agent, author; James Carville; and Mary Matalin
NBC News
Updated: 11:34 a.m. ET May 8, 2005

PLEASE CREDIT ANY QUOTES OR EXCERPTS FROM THIS NBC TELEVISION PROGRAM TO "NBC NEWS' MEET THE PRESS."



NBC News MEET THE PRESS

Sunday, May 8, 2005

Guests: Gary Schroen, former senior CIA agent, Author of “First In: How seven CIA officers opened the war on terrorism in Afghanistan;”

James Carville, political strategist;

Mary Matalin, political strategist

Moderator: Tim Russert, NBC News

MR. TIM RUSSERT: Our issues this Sunday: This man, the third ranking al-Qaeda leader, Abu Faraj Al-Libbi, is captured. Why is this man, Osama bin Laden, still on the loose?

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And will this man, North Korea's Kim Jong Il, sell nuclear weapons to al-Qaeda or use them to blackmail the world?

With us, Gary Schroen, a CIA officer for 32 years and author of "First In: An Insider's Account of How the CIA Spearheaded the War on Terror in Afghanistan."

Then: Social Security, John Bolton, Tom DeLay, the Bush second term and the field for 2008. With us for the Democrats, James Carville; for the Republicans, Mary Matalin. The political odd couple square off.

But first, the war on terrorism through the eyes of CIA veteran, now author, Gary Schroen.

Mr. Schroen, welcome to MEET THE PRESS.

MR. GARY SCHROEN: Thank you very much, sir.

MR. RUSSERT: Let me show you this photograph. Here is Abu Faraj Al-Libbi, captured, described as the number-three man in al-Qaeda. How significant was his arrest?

MR. SCHROEN: I think it's significant in two ways, Tim. He is the number-three guy. He replaced Khalid Shaikh Mohammed, who was a mastermind of many of the attacks. His arrest will significantly damage the al-Qaeda organization. It's important in a second way because it demonstrates that the Pakistani government and military are willing to go into tribal areas north of Peshawar, where it's most likely that bin Laden and Ayman al-Zawahari are hiding.

MR. RUSSERT: Number one and two.

MR. SCHROEN: Number one and two.

MR. RUSSERT: Richard Clark, who headed up counterterrorism for the White House said on Wednesday, "I think the original al Qaeda, the people who attacked us on September 11th, really doesn't exist any more as a threat, as an organization. But there are other organizations out there related to the original al Qaeda, that pose a significant threat."

Do you agree with that?

MR. SCHROEN: To some extent. Bin Laden is isolated, but I believe that he is able to still influence and communicate with his organization. It's true that terrorism has been globalized now in a way after 9/11 that's significant. But bin Laden remains a critical figure for us to focus on and to capture.

MR. RUSSERT: And direct the operation?

MR. SCHROEN: I don't know if he is actually directing it, but his spiritual guidance and his encouragement certainly adds emphasis to attacks around the world and groups around the world operating against us.

MR. RUSSERT: On September 1, 2001, you began a 90-day phaseout retiring from the CIA. Then came the horrific day of 8:46 AM, September 11, 2001. All our lives changed. You were asked to stay on at the CIA. On September 13th, you were summoned to the office of Cofer Black, the head of counterterrorism for the CIA. What did he tell you? What was your mission?

MR. SCHROEN: The mission was to--the first part of it was to go in and link up with the Northern Alliance, formerly headed by Ahmed Al-Massoud, and to win their confidence and their agreement to cooperate militarily with us. They were the only armed force on the ground in Afghanistan opposing the Taliban. The second part of it was, once the Taliban were broken, to attack the al-Qaeda organization, find bin Laden and his senior lieutenants and kill them.

MR. RUSSERT: Kill them?

MR. SCHROEN: Kill them.

MR. RUSSERT: Wasn't it illegal for us to kill foreign leaders?

MR. SCHROEN: I don't think at that point that the--I think the administration had gotten to the point where bin Laden and his guys were fair game.

MR. RUSSERT: As part of war?

MR. SCHROEN: As part of war.

MR. RUSSERT: Mr. Black gave you specific instructions on what he wanted you to bring home.

MR. SCHROEN: That's true. He did ask that once we got bin Laden and killed him, that we send his head back in a cardboard box on dry ice so that he could take it down and show the president.

MR. RUSSERT: Where would you find the dry ice in Afghanistan?

MR. SCHROEN: That's what I mentioned to him. I said, "Cofer, I think that I can come up with pikes to put the heads of the lieutenants on," which is the second part of what he wanted done. "Dry ice, we'll have to improvise."

MR. RUSSERT: Why couldn't you find bin Laden?

MR. SCHROEN: Initially, when we entered Afghanistan, I don't think there was a real clear view back in Washington or in the field as to what we would face there. We were actually behind the lines. We were deep into Afghanistan about 30 miles from the Taliban front lines hosted by this armed force, and it was almost impossible for even Massoud and his organization to operate beyond the limited area that they controlled.

MR. RUSSERT: And so it's just impossible to penetrate.

MR. SCHROEN: At that point, it was and it became very clear to actually go after the al-Qaeda and to get at bin Laden we would have to defeat the Taliban militarily and take them out of the equation.

MR. RUSSERT: Now, you brought with you $3 million in American cash, 100-dollar bills.

MR. SCHROEN: That's correct.

MR. RUSSERT: How many suitcases is that for that amount of money?

MR. SCHROEN: One very big, very heavy suitcase.

MR. RUSSERT: And what did you do with the money?

MR. SCHROEN: We basically used it to assure the leadership of the Northern Alliance that we were serious, that we dispensed the money to allow them to buy equipment, materiel and other things that they needed to bring their forces up to full combat strength.

MR. RUSSERT: We had read at that time that John Walker Lindh, this young American teenager, in effect...

MR. SCHROEN: Yeah.

MR. RUSSERT: ...had become part of al-Qaeda.

MR. SCHROEN: Yeah.

MR. RUSSERT: And the question I asked then and I ask you now is how could an American teenager infiltrate al-Qaeda and not the CIA?

MR. SCHROEN: Well, that question's been asked a lot in discussions: Why don't we infiltrate? But if you actually look at what John Walker Lindh was and where he was at, he was a foot soldier. He was never going to be trusted to do anything other than carry a gun and carry out the most basic orders. He was certainly never going to sit in a council with bin Laden or his senior lieutenants. And in the end, he ended up standing in chest-deep ice cold water in the basement of Qala Jangi prison, a fort there, fighting it out with American forces.

MR. RUSSERT: Let me turn to your book and talk about Mr. bin Laden. "Usama bin Ladin and Ayman al-Zawahiri are hiding somewhere in the tribal areas of Pakistan. They are undoubtedly being assisted by tribal leaders who dislike the Pakistani government and who enjoy the financial rewards bin Ladin brings to them. Winning full Pakistani military cooperation, refocusing military strategy by U.S. forces on the Afghan side of the border, bringing back Special Operations units, and beefing up the number of CIA teams in the border areas would allow for coordinated military operations on both sides of the border. This is the only way to locate and eliminate bin Ladin ..."

Why aren't we doing what you recommend?

MR. SCHROEN: We're--since that was written, I think we've started to pull--there are more Special Forces troops there. We are still shorthanded as far as CIA officers on the ground in those border areas. Again, the demand on personnel, both special operations and military, and CIA in Iraq are huge and it makes staffing there difficult.

We are able to operate effectively on the Afghan side of the border. The problem rests in Pakistan. The Pakistanis' military and intelligence service is very reluctant to go into the tribal areas north of Peshawar, Bashir, Derr and Momad agency. I have a long felt personally that that was where bin Laden went to after they escaped--he and Zawahiri escaped from Tora Bora.

MR. RUSSERT: Do you believe that we know where bin Laden is right now?

MR. SCHROEN: No, we don't know where he's at other than the general area.

MR. RUSSERT: Do you think the Pakistanis have a pretty good sense where he is?

MR. SCHROEN: I think within the military and ISID at a a certain level, they certainly do now where he is.

MR. RUSSERT: ISID being Pakistani Intelligence...

MR. SCHROEN: Pakistani Intelligence Service.

MR. RUSSERT: Let me show you the map of the border area. It's the border 1,640 miles long, the mountainous region about the size of the country of Ireland. And you think up there in the upper right hand corner?

MR. SCHROEN: Upper right hand corner, there is a little--you know, the little jot out there is where Peshawar is, and north of that is a rugged area. It's traditionally been the most hostile area to any kind of government control. The tribals there have made centuries of living smuggling and it's one of the main drug trafficking routes in and out of the country. And bin Laden is very respected and liked in that area.

MR. RUSSERT: And they're protecting him?

MR. SCHROEN: I think they're protecting him for a number of reasons. He is considered to be a Robin Hood-like figure. He has made a, you know, mockery of our efforts to catch him for all these years, and he probably has a nice checkbook that he is writing sizeable amounts of checks for these people hosting him.

MR. RUSSERT: Tom Brokaw interviewed General Pervez Musharraf in Pakistan and talked about capturing bin Laden. Let me show you part of that interview.

(Videotape, May 4, 2005):

MR. TOM BROKAW: Is there a danger for you, personally, and for your government, that if Pakistani troops take down Osama bin Laden in what would probably be a difficult struggle, it would cause an uprising in some of the cities in your country, and in the refugee camps?

GEN. PERVEZ MUSHARRAF: Well, there would be effects, but we shouldn't be so naive as to capture him and then go around telling everyone and going around with him everywhere. I mean, there is a method of dealing with the situation.

MR. BROKAW: But it would be delicate, wouldn't it?

GEN. MUSHARRAF: It would be certainly delicate, not only here but even in the Islamic world.

(End videotape)

MR. RUSSERT: Mr. Musharraf: "It would be delicate here in Pakistan and the Islamic world." Is there a distinct possibility that Mr. Musharraf is afraid of capturing Osama bin Laden because he would fear that his government would be toppled?

MR. SCHROEN: In my opinion, that's a real likelihood, that the Pakistanis have cooperated pretty wholesomely in helping us capture a lot of al-Qaeda officers up to Khalid Shaikh Mohammed, and this-- the capture of Al-Libbi recently is a significant event but to take on bin Laden, there would be an uproar within that country and around the Islamic world that would really cause the foundations of the Pakistani government to be shaken.

MR. RUSSERT: After Al-Libbi was captured, some citizens in the town told NBC News: "If we had known it was him, we would have protected him."

MR. SCHROEN: I think that's probably very accurate. And if we were able to find bin Laden, and identify that to the Pakistanis, I would suspect that there would be a great reluctance and probably a refusal to move forward. That's my opinion.

MR. RUSSERT: In 1999, we had located bin Laden at a hunting camp where some Arab princes were also hunting with him. And there was a big discussion, debate whether or not to launch cruise missiles and take out bin Laden. Why didn't we do it?

MR. SCHROEN: The debate came down to the fact that we would be using cruise missiles and that this camp would be undoubtedly totally destroyed. There were a number of princes from the United Arab Emirates. This was a camp that was being supported by the UAE government, UAE military; C-130s were supplying these guys with the amenities that they needed. Bin Laden was there. And the debate-- we had the plan, our guys had scoped the camp out, put a beacon down so that we knew it was the exact camp. And then it got into, "Well, what tent does bin Laden sleep in? Where does he eat? Where does he go to the bathroom?" So these kinds of questions dragged on and on for two weeks. And, finally, the administration's decision was not to take the strike because of the collateral damage that would occur.

MR. RUSSERT: This is the Clinton administration?

MR. SCHROEN: Yes.

MR. RUSSERT: You're convinced we could have gotten bin Laden then?

MR. SCHROEN: Absolutely. Our guys had eyes on him. Well...

MR. RUSSERT: And the what-ifs. This was in 1999, two years before 2001.

MR. SCHROEN: Exactly. The what-ifs.

MR. RUSSERT: Let me turn to bin Laden and the president's comments on September 17, 2001. Here's George W. Bush.

(Videotape, September 17, 2001):

PRESIDENT GEORGE W. BUSH: I want him--I want justice. And there's an old poster out West, as I recall, that said "Wanted, Dead or Alive."

(End videotape)

MR. RUSSERT: In December of 2001, the battle of Tora Bora. This is what you write. "In early 2002, in the immediate aftermath of the battle of Tora Bora and the subsequent escape of Osama bin Laden and his chief lieutenant, Ayman al-Zawahari, CIA and specially trained U.S. military Special Operations units began to organize teams in the provincial areas east and south of Kabul, along Afghanistan's border with Pakistan."

You have no doubt that bin Laden escaped at Tora Bora?

MR. SCHROEN: No doubt at all. When the first film--videotape that was made--that he made afterwards shows him that he was holding his left side and was probably wounded there in the battle, but every bit of information we had at the time indicated that he had escaped and moved into the Waziristan area which is south of Peshawar.

MR. RUSSERT: How did he get away?

MR. SCHROEN: We had done--followed the same lead we had taken since September of '01 in defeating the Taliban. We were attacking with U.S. military forces against the al-Qaeda and Taliban militants, and we hired local tribal leaders to guard the escape routes into Pakistan. Unfortunately, many of those people proved to be loyal to bin Laden and sympathizers with the Taliban and they allowed the key guys to escape.

MR. RUSSERT: In the heat of the presidential campaign in 2004, John Kerry as part of his stump speech in effect would say things like this. Let's watch.

(Videotape, October 30, 2004):

SEN. JOHN KERRY, (D-MA): As I have said for two years now, when Osama bin Laden and al-Qaeda were cornered in the mountains of Tora Bora, it was wrong to outsource the job of capturing them to Afghan warlords who a week earlier were fighting against us.

(End videotape)

MR. RUSSERT: Should we have had more U.S. troops in Afghanistan circling Tora Bora to prevent his escape?

MR. SCHROEN: In hindsight that would have been ideal. We fought a special operations war. It was CIA and Army Green Berets on the ground directing the bombing campaign. It was only late in the campaign that U.S. ground forces came in, and the evolution, I think, simply we didn't take it far enough. If we'd have had one more battle after Tora Bora, we probably would have gotten it right.

MR. RUSSERT: Again, in October of 2004, in the presidential campaign, after John Kerry made those charges, General Tommy Franks offered this observation. "We don't know to this day whether Mr. bin Laden was at Tora Bora in December 2001. ...Mr. bin Laden was never within our grasp."

You just disagree with that?

MR. SCHROEN: I absolutely do, yes.

MR. RUSSERT: And President Bush and Vice President Cheney all quoted General Franks, saying: "We don't know if bin Laden was at Tora Bora." You have no doubt.

MR. SCHROEN: I have no doubt that he was there.

MR. RUSSERT: Let me turn again to your book. "The United States is continuing to pour billions of dollars and sacrifice the lives of American soldiers in order to bring peace and democracy to Iraq. This is being done at the expense of Afghanistan. ... Given the total preoccupation with Iraq, I am not confident that the U.S. government will make the policy adjustments necessary to improve conditions for the success of the democratic experiment in Afghanistan, or refocus diplomatic and military efforts back to the South Asia region in order to capture Osama bin Laden and defeat al-Qa'ida. The opportunity to make these changes exists now; if we fail in these efforts, we do so at our peril."

Are you suggesting--do you believe that Iraq is a distraction, a preoccupation, and it is really limiting our ability to capture Osama bin Laden and secure Afghanistan?

MR. SCHROEN: I absolutely do. Afghanistan gets a distant second on all aspects, whether it's going to be military or aid that's going to be given to the country. Afghanistan is--the elections were successful. There is a beginning of democracy there. It's very fragile. The--but I think the entire population wants peace. It's a matter of how they share the pie. And we could do a lot more to bring that democracy to full birth if we would focus more attention, more money on that country.

MR. RUSSERT: Which is more important, do you believe, to the war on terrorism, Afghanistan or Iraq?

MR. SCHROEN: At this point, unfortunately, the Iraqi situation has gotten so large that it's become a major issue that has to be dealt with. I think, though, that ultimately we owe it to Afghanistan and to ourselves to end this al-Qaeda threat there and defeat the Taliban completely and let that country move forward so it doesn't become a safe haven for terrorism again.

MR. RUSSERT: In October of 2003, Secretary of Defense Rumsfeld wrote an internal memo where he was opining about terrorists. And he said, "Today we lack metrics to know if we are winning or losing the global war on terror. Are we capturing, killing or deterring and dissuading more terrorists every day than the madrassas and the radical clerics are recruiting, training and deploying against us?"

Let me just there. That's a pretty interesting question. What do you think?

MR. SCHROEN: I think, unfortunately, the attack on Iraq has caused, really, a sort of insurgent rebirth. I mean, there are a lot of more terrorists out there now. People are--they don't have to take their orders from bin Laden. They see this as an international jihad. And I think it is difficult to measure. I think we probably at this point are barely holding our own.

MR. RUSSERT: Can we win the war on terror without winning the hearts and minds of the Islamic world?

MR. SCHROEN: No. I don't think we can. Part of the problem is that we are not hated by these people because of who we are, but the policies that we follow in the Middle East: "occupation" of Saudi Arabia, our policies in Iraq prior to the war, our support for Israel and all. These are issues that burn deeply within the Islamic world.

MR. RUSSERT: Before you go, I want to take advantage of your expertise on another issue. The Robb- Silverman commission--the president--Chuck Robb and Lawrence Silverman, on weapons of mass destruction not being found in Iraq--added this note: "The [Robb-Silverman WMD] commission made it clear it is concerned about the quality of intelligence on nuclear programs in Iran and North Korea. `The intelligence community knows disturbingly little about the nuclear programs of many of the world's most dangerous actors,' the commission reported. `In some cases, it knows less than it did five or 10 years ago.'"

That's pretty chilling.

MR. SCHROEN: It is, especially when you look at--well, Iran is an area that I know well, and it--I think we probably do know less now than we did a few years ago.

MR. RUSSERT: Do you have any doubt that Iran would like to have nuclear weapons?

MR. SCHROEN: Oh, absolutely. They would. They're the strongest supporters for the Palestinian cause. They support the Hamas and the Hezbollah there. They would like to have a nuclear weapon very, very much.

MR. RUSSERT: If Kim Jong Il in North Korea has six nuclear bombs, what are the possibilities that he would, being starved for money, decide to sell a nuclear weapon to al-Qaeda?

MR. SCHROEN: I'm certainly not an expert on Kim Jong Il, but I think that there would be a really strong possibility that he would consider that at any time, if the offer was right.

MR. RUSSERT: And North Koreans and the Iranians, if, in fact, they begin to possess nuclear weapons that can be detonated, the possibility of blackmail against the world?

MR. SCHROEN: Exactly. It's a frightening scenario.

MR. RUSSERT: Is there anything we can do to stop it?

MR. SCHROEN: We--with the Iranians, we'd have to sort of reinvent our diplomatic approach to them and all, and I think that this administration has started that by dealing with the Europeans. But it's a long, hard road. There are no moderates in Iran, really.

MR. RUSSERT: Is there any possibility militarily for us to stop the production in Iran or North Korea?

MR. SCHROEN: I'm not an expert on that. I would think that would be the worst thing we could do, though. If we want to set back our relations with Iran and send them--the last thing we need to do is attack Iran.

MR. RUSSERT: Before you go, will we ever capture Osama bin Laden?

MR. SCHROEN: I think with the capture of Al-Libbi recently--gives some hope that the Pakistanis will cooperate if we put enough pressure on them, and maybe we end up doing it unilaterally but I think we're going to get him within the next three to four months.

MR. RUSSERT: Three to four months.

MR. SCHROEN: Well, that's my hope.

MR. RUSSERT: From your lips to God's ears. Gary Schroen, we thank you very much, and our condolences on the loss of your mom, Fern, on Friday.

MR. SCHROEN: Oh, thank you very much.

Sunday, May 08, 2005

who was that man

I was coming home on the subway tonight and gave up the double seat to two chinese women at canal street so they could sit together. i took a seat on the end that was being blocked by a stroller. I looked at him and he was holding a young child. I asked to sit, and he moved the stroller slightly. He started to talk to the man across the aisle from me... There were a group of men with MEXICO paraphenilia... i thought must be a mexican event in Manhattan today... the woman was sitting infront of him, sleeping....
I started to read, then i started to look at the Baby.. the baby dropped his shoe and i bent down to pick it up...i handed it to the man who said thank you... in a broken english....
i asked how old the baby was..... 7 months.. almost.. 6 months and more said the man...
the child's name is david he said after i asked...
he started to talk to me, asking me if i had children.... he said 1, 2, 3.... i said NONE...
he asked if i wanted children.... i said i always wanted children, and he asked why i have never had them...
i told him that it just hasnt happened... he said there is still time
( i am not sure there is still time, but he believed it)
i told him, i work with many many children..... i take care of children, i explained..
he asked me .... how i take care of them... i said like a teacher.... he asked the child who was smiling at me, taken with me ... if the child wanted me to care for him
he asked me how much i charged to care for kids...
i then explained i am a social worker and dont teach children...
he asked me if i ever married.... i said no i have never married... he said there is still time and you never know when ... your time will come

he got off at beverly road with his son David and wife and i wished her a happy mothers day

amos, merle and Bobby vs Terri, brad and REBA

two weeks in a row, i went to saturday night concerts. the first at the Beacon Theater in NYC. The second at the PNC arts center in NJ. the Beacon a theater with walls, THe PNC an out door amphitheater.
The first started with short lines and security goons that checked my bag and allowed in packaged food and an open diet coke. (even i was surprised at the open coke) and they were respectful.. I took my first balcony seat and went to the 2nd floor restroom.. NO line.. later through the night, short lines... the venue sold beer and wine and popcorn and there was no one drunk... once the light went down... there WAS a familiar smell of smoke... Someone was smoking pot.. the security goons told him to put it out... it happened a few more times..
The audience were boomers with their kids, 20 somethings... Old dead fans and long pony tails and leather.. There were run of the market executives in shirts and there were NYC teenagers in their chic soho couture... the enforcers also forced the SRO ticket holders to stand for all three sets..
i came early for Amos lee (who i had seen with Norah jones last summer at jones beach) i skipped norah jones but fell for Amos Lee...
So as uncool as it was to come early at the beacon, i chose to show up... Amos was great.. and then the lights and rearrange the stage for Merle Haggard.. The black hats started to appear and there were more people in the theater.. I guess its fashionable to show up late for Dylan..but for those us there...
Haggard got his props.. the audience were on their feet- A man in his 70s, still singing and writing music.. A man who earned it the hard way... A legend.... A talent...
I was on the edge of my chair.. He was in great voice with a great band of strangers..
his songs included, the Fugative, Mama Tried, Rambling Fever, Unforgettable and a variety of Drinking songs where Booze was the culprit..
I guess it was NY cool to show up at 930 pm only for Dylan... boy did they miss a great set by Haggard...

Then Dylan... ripping through 14 songs with out a word... never really looking up ... covering his catalogue.. Hunched over the piano.... seemed like he really didnt play it sometimes and sometimes, he played it all... harmonic.. piano.. his new performing love..
HIghway 61, Blonde on Blonde, Blood on the Tracks, Love and Theft... all represented..
understanding bobs phrasing is hard... he dribbles the songs out with a loud loud band
Dylan blends into the band... he is one with them...
10 to 11 and an encore starting... Dylan gets in two .... Poor Boy and ends with ALL along the
watchtower... complete with some random dancers in the balcony
i leave thinking.. who is the joker and thief.... Dylan

i got on the train southbound to brooklyn and was home by 1230am

Last saturday, My friend Fay and i went to the PNC arts center in Holmdel NJ for another show of three artists.. the first thing we encountered were Lines lines lines.. Lines to get in, lines to park.. we had to park so far away that we had to drive across the highway and park in the sublet lot B... we had to take a shuttle but opted to hike to the venue.. what seemed like taking forever to the MAIN gate... what main gate... a long long line to get your bag checked... (i had no bag) and because there were lawn seats.... the line was longer... then a line to get your ticketmaster ticket scanned and lines lines for hte restroom... not being able to find the entrance we hightailed it upstairs to find a food court with a restroom with no line..

the show had started and we missed about 2 of Terri Clarks songs... she looked and sounded great... her set covered, Better thing to do, If i were you, poor poor pitiful me (with cowbell)
evertime i cry, girls lie too....
then a break..... seeing it was an amphitheater- i hadnt gotten a chance to see the "show within the show" ... there were plenty of hats, straw hats, black felt hats, there were shirts that displayed NASCAR, Sports teams, and one guy had a shirt that was an american flag..
There was a woman in a fur coat. She also had a purple chenille hat...
Fay and I had no hats...and we missed the tailgate parties in the lot.... i ate a salad at a diner...

as it was an outdoor venue...as the sun set, it got colder and colder... I mocked the women in their winter coats but by nights end... i envied that they had them.. I could have used something more than my NY black turtleneck and black leather jacket... I could have used a second pair of socks...

Brad paisley was next and he and his band -all from NJ? played an hour set... Me neither, he didnt have to be, we danced, im gonna miss her, mud on the tires, Celebrity, and Whiskey lullabye complete with a video screen with Alison Krauss appearing in the duet...

Video screen were filled with images for each artist.... the stories the sang were told in video...
while you watched the artist sing the song... its was a multimedia event actually....

then another break... or more beer breaks... there were lots of high price beverages being consumed at this show and some random dancers were dancing at their seats..

then the stage went dark... and AD for Habitat for Humanity... Whirlpool donates washers and dryers to each HFH home... and they sponsored with the Two HAts and a red head tour...

Reba is not a performer, she is an entertainer... she ripped through her catalogue... speaking with the audience, using the stage and her huge band to move the show along.. She was won over the choir of fans who were there for HER... the brad paisley tesshirts seemed to pale in the face of this performance.... REBA covered a medley of early hits.. and inlcuded, im a survivor,
sisters, heart is a lonely hunter, Take it back, night the lights went out, fear of being alone, want to ride with you, why havent i heard from you, love revival, who ever's in New england, fancy
and for her encore.... Terri joined her for Does he love you with brad playing electric guitar
and all three joined in for " when will i be loved?"

getting back the car, by way of the restroom was an adventure in itself... And then exiting the parking lot ... Fay drove to her home where i had my car parked..

I got in my car at midnight and was home by 1230 am

Saturday, May 07, 2005

Fun MERE
STolen from Connorgal's live journal

1. Grab the nearest book
2. Open to Page 123
3. Find the 5th full sentance
4. Post it along with these instructions in your live journal
5. Dont search for the coolest book, just the first near you.


Alfred Kadushin

Supervision in Social Work

page 123

"the general principle might be to grant supervisees as much freedom as is compatible with effecient and effective and equitable implementation of the agency's goal."

Thursday, May 05, 2005

walking up to bombs bursting on 3rd ave

My morning paper said genades were blow off on 3rd ave... as i drove thru Manhttan and saw the statue of liberty, empire state and chryler building... i had to remember we are vunerable..
Bloomberg on NPR said Such things as 9-11 happen.. like they were daily occurances..

I will never get used to bombs.... or military in the subway or armed guards in airports..nor do i have to ....

Wednesday, May 04, 2005

Your losses according to the B*sh Social Security plan

http://schumer.senate.gov/calc/index.html#

Figure yours out youself

Justice in small steps....

Judge Throws Out England's Guilty Plea By T.A. BADGER, Associated Press Writer
6 minutes ago



FORT HOOD, Texas - A military judge on Wednesday threw out Pfc. Lynndie England's guilty plea to prisoner abuse at Abu Ghraib, saying he was not convinced that she knew her actions were wrong at the time.

Col. James Pohl entered a plea of not guilty for England to a charge of conspiring with Pvt. Charles Graner Jr. to maltreat detainees at the Baghdad-area prison.

The mistrial for the 22-year-old reservist, who appeared in some of the most notorious photographs from the 2003 abuse scandal, kicks the case back to the military equivalent of a grand jury proceeding.

The action came after Graner, the reputed ringleader of the abuse, testified as a defense witness at England's sentencing hearing that pictures he took of England holding a naked prisoner on a leash at Abu Ghraib were meant to be used as a legitimate training aid for other guards.

Other photos showed England standing next to nude prisoners stacked in a pyramid and pointing at a prisoner's genitals.

When England pleaded guilty Monday, she told the judge she knew that the pictures were being taken purely for the amusement of the guards.

Pohl said the two statements could not be reconciled.

"You can't have a one-person conspiracy," the judge said before he declared the mistrial and dismissed the sentencing jury.

Under military law, the judge could formally accept her guilty plea only if he was convinced that she knew at the time that what she was doing was illegal.

By rejecting the plea to the conspiracy charge, Pohl canceled the entire plea agreement.

During defense questioning, Graner said he looped the leash around the prisoner's shoulders as a way to coax him out of a cell, and that it slipped up around his neck. He said he asked England to hold the strap while he took photos that he could show to other guards later to teach them this prisoner-handling technique.

At that point Pohl halted Graner's testimony and admonished the defense for admitting evidence that ran counter to England's plea on the conspiracy charge and one count of maltreating detainees.

The judge did not discuss the other five counts to which England had pleaded guilty.

Graner, who is said to be the father of England's infant son, was found guilty in January and is serving a 10-year prison term for his role in the scandal.

In a handwritten note given to reporters Tuesday, Graner had said he wanted England to fight the charges.

"Knowing what happened in Iraq, it was very upsetting to see Lynn plead guilty to her charges," he wrote. "I would hope that by doing so she will have a better chance at a good sentence."

Graner maintains that he and the other Abu Ghraib guards were following orders from higher-ranking interrogators when they abused the detainees

Capricorn Horoscope for week of May 5, 2005

Capricorn Horoscope for week of May 5, 2005

Studies show that judicious chocolate consumption promotes longevity. People who ingest it three times a month are more likely to live into their 90s than those who either refrain from eating it or else gorge on it frequently. The astrological omens suggest, however, that your health will be well-served by eating 300 percent more than the judicious amount this May, beginning with a virtual orgy of chocolate feasting this week. I recommend that you also seek out other experiences that generate feelings similar to those stirred by a chocolate feast.

who is next martha stewart???

Nike Pulls Products From Sears So They Stay Out of Kmart
By Michael Kahn and Emily Kaiser, Reuters

SAN FRANCISCO/CHICAGO (May 4) - Nike Inc. told Reuters on Tuesday it will pull its products from Sears department stores in a move that effectively blocks discount retailer Kmart from carrying the famous "swoosh" brand.


Analysts saw Nike's move as an attempt to protect its high-end image as Kmart starts selling well-known Sears brands, although the world's biggest athletic shoe maker did not comment on the Sears-Kmart deal.

if you believe

If you believe that every step we take, every event we encounter, every person we meet, every moment we live has a purpose in our growth and expansion..Every time we are late, we may be avoiding an accident or meeting up with another that is meant to cross our path or we theirs... then WHY is it .. that the last thing i heard on air america from Radio Jock..Jerry Springer today as i parked my car- that today is the 35th anniversary of the KENT STATE killings.. He read the names of the 4 young adults who were killed 35 years ago today

Tuesday, May 03, 2005

Obituary of Von kloberg

Tyrants' Lobbyist, Flamboyant to the End
Von Kloberg Dies After Years as an Image Shaper for the Reviled

By Adam Bernstein
Washington Post Staff Writer
Tuesday, May 3, 2005; Page A01

As part of Washington's image machinery for more than two decades, Edward von Kloberg III did his best to sanitize some of the late 20th century's most notorious dictators as they sought favors and approval from U.S. officials.

A legend of sorts in public relations circles, he counted as clients Saddam Hussein of Iraq; Samuel K. Doe of Liberia; Nicolae Ceausescu of Romania; the military regime in Burma; Guatemalan businessmen who supported the country's murderous, military-backed government; Mobutu Sese Seko of the former Zaire; and, in a figurative coup of his own, the man who overthrew Mobutu and renamed the country the Democratic Republic of the Congo.


Edward von Kloberg III, shown in 1990, relished the presence of world leaders and was once singled out for
Edward von Kloberg III, shown in 1990, relished the presence of world leaders and was once singled out for "handling clients that no one else will touch." (By Frank Johnston -- The Washington Post)

Von Kloberg embraced the slogan "shame is for sissies" as well as an unabashedly Edwardian style of living. He arrived at balls and galas wearing black capes, and he traveled with steamer trunks. He added the "von" to his name because he thought it sounded distinguished.

In a life full of flamboyance, his end followed form: The District resident, 63, leapt to his death Sunday from "a castle in Rome," a State Department spokeswoman said. Von Kloberg's sister said a lengthy note was found on the body, and U.S. Embassy officials in Rome told her that he committed suicide.

His clients handsomely paid him for his social and diplomatic clout. He often took them to his favorite lunch spot, the Jockey Club, the famed but now defunct restaurant in the Westin Fairfax Hotel. He would get tipped off when first lady Nancy Reagan or some ranking administration figure had made a reservation. Such unofficial meetings often were effective ways to win an audience with U.S. powerbrokers otherwise inclined to close their doors to representatives of reviled regimes.

Von Kloberg expressed no ethical concerns about his work, saying people such as Hussein were U.S. allies at the time. He said he was "utterly fascinated" by the Iraqi leader and returned to the District to "propagandize why they were gassing the Kurds." The reason given, he said, was to prevent Arab fundamentalism from spreading in the Persian Gulf.

"That's pretty awful, isn't it?" he said in an interview. "That's what you had to do for the overall point."

Political pariahs, he said, were like defendants at trial who have a right to legal counsel. By encouraging investment relations between the United States and his clients' countries, he hoped to foster a democratizing influence abroad.

He cited the case of Ceausescu, for whom he won U.S. trade concessions. In return, he said, the dictator permitted the printing of Bibles for the first time in decades and, for a stiff price, allowed Soviet Jews to travel through Romania on their way to Israel.

Edward Joseph Kloberg III was born Jan. 9, 1942, in New York, where his father was an engineer who built housing projects. He added "van" to his surname in the 1960s and decades later changed it to "von" when Arnaud de Borchgrave, the dapper newsman, told him it sounded more distinguished.

Von Kloberg described a pampered upbringing, in which older, female relatives lavished attention on him. His grandmother provided him with an entertaining allowance, which he used while at Princeton University to throw "great parties." However, he flunked out and graduated down the road at Rider College in Lawrenceville, N.J., in 1965.

At American University, he received a master's degree in history -- writing his key papers on the Borgia popes and Mohammed Ali Pasha, the founder of modern Egypt. But his true passion was throwing soirees that won him such admirers as Garnett Stackelberg, the society columnist. He later struck up friendships with Holly Coors, the Republican fundraiser, and Barbara "Bobo" Sears Rockefeller, the ex-wife of a Standard Oil heir.

Hired by American University, he became a key fundraiser and advanced to be the dean of admissions and financial aid.

In 1982, von Kloberg began his public relations and lobbying business, later renamed the Washington World Group. He hired former diplomats and foreign affairs specialists as well as Bennetta B. Washington, wife of former D.C. mayor Walter E. Washington.

He had trouble paying the staff and in 1984 pleaded guilty to faking letters of support from ambassadors in an effort to attain a $60,000 bank loan. He was sentenced to five years of probation and 100 hours of community service. "No money ever changed hands, and I took complete blame," he said in an interview.

Washington is a city of advocates and image enhancers, but only a few have staked their reputations as representatives of despots, dictators and human rights violators. For von Kloberg, the job was a social exercise as well as an all-consuming effort. As he wooed potential clients, he often highlighted his own bad press. There was a lot.

Epithets abounded. The authors of "Washington Babylon," a muckraking book about powerbrokers, wrote: "Even within the amoral world of Washington lobbying, [he] stands out for handling clients that no one else will touch." Washingtonian magazine once named him one of the city's top 50 "hired guns."

By far the most outrageous and lasting public impression of von Kloberg came from a notorious "sting" operation by Spy magazine. For a story the satirical journal titled "Washington's Most Shameless Lobbyist," a staff writer posed as a Nazi sympathizer whose causes included halting immigration to the "fatherland" and calling for the German annexation of Poland.

According to the magazine, von Kloberg expressed sympathy for the fake client -- and her $1 million offer. And then he was drubbed in print. Shortly afterward, he showed up at the opening of Spy's Washington office with a first-aid kit and sported a trench helmet, "so I can take the flak," he announced.

Friends of von Kloberg saw the article as a revolting caricature of a man whose grace and charm were displayed at intimate dinner parties he threw to unite disparate voices -- 3,500 dinners, each with 12 guests, he estimated.

At one gathering, he persuaded Nizar Hamdoon, Iraq's ambassador to the United States and the United Nations under Hussein, to meet Jews for the first time. He also brought together District residents, diplomats, socialites and journalists; many of the latter were fond of his famously accurate news tips.

His voice, said one friend, was marked by an "almost Rooseveltian, high-class accent." He drove enormous black cars and draped foreign medals (Zaire's Order of the Leopard among them) across his tuxedo. At night, he sported one of two favorite black capes: one with red lining, the other with prints of doves.

As was said of the Bloomsbury diarist Violet Trefusis, a writer he admired, von Kloberg had a "taste for outmoded splendors." He believed such flourishes were essential to conducting business with world leaders, the kings and presidents for life whose presence he relished. When they listened to his advice, it was "very invigorating," he said.

Von Kloberg's friends in the diplomatic community did not abandon him, and his success on trade and investment missions helped him rebuild his clientele.

Nor did the Spy article hurt. "You'd be surprised how much business I got as a result," he said.




Some people were untouchable, as far as he was concerned. He said he once turned down work for Somali warlord Mohamed Farah Aideed, who offered $1 million shortly before he was shot to death in 1996. Von Kloberg said there was no potential for "turning around" that country. Among those he wanted to help was Alfredo Stroessner, but he said the long-serving Paraguayan strongman never hired a lobbyist.

Von Kloberg, who "tested" his clients by asking them to pay his first-class airfare along with $5,000 a day, spoke poorly only of one client, the Burmese businessman who "stiffed" him for thousands of dollars in work for the South Asian country.

He had numerous short escapes, flying out of Liberia shortly before a rebel advance and enduring a missile blast at his hotel in Baghdad (a Scud that he said Hussein launched for propaganda purposes).

Von Kloberg was lively and peripatetic, constantly crossing the globe and usually returning calls after midnight. His social calendar was demanding, and he had a rule in case a party was a flop: "As soon as you can, learn all the back exits."

His final years were painful medically. He had cancer, diabetes and the inner-ear condition known as Meniere's disease, which caused a ceaseless ringing sensation. In 2002, he retired after suffering a heart attack during a flight from the Ivory Coast to Paris. He had with him five trunks of luggage, which he claimed before going to the hospital.

Never one to go anywhere unprepared, he phoned The Washington Post months before his death to arrange an interview that he hoped would lead to a better understanding of his life. He said there had been greater challenges and rewards in his career than had he crusaded for a "good" cause.

Survivors include his companion, Darius Monkevicius of Rome; and a sister, Carol van Kloberg of Saratoga Springs, N.Y

letting go

why is that i am having trouble letting go of those last 5 lbs?

why am i having trouble letting go of the plate in my arm?

Monday, May 02, 2005

Friend O' Hillary

Dear Friends,

There has never been a more important time for us to stand together and fight back against those who are trying to undermine our system of democracy!

Every day in Washington, we see more examples of attempts to rewrite the rules and brush aside the system of checks and balances that has served us well for more than 200 years.

That's why I am pleased that so many of you joined as “citizen co-sponsors” of the Count Every Vote Act, a bill that will restore the integrity of our system and strengthen our democracy.

Stand with me as a Citizen Co-Sponsor:
http://www.friendsofhillary.com/CountEveryVote

The Count Every Vote Act provides for common sense reforms that will make an immediate difference. This bill ensures that every electronic voting machine provides a verified paper ballot for every vote cast; sets uniform standards for provisional ballots; and requires uniform access to voting machines so residents of minority communities will not have to wait hours to cast their ballots while other precincts in the same state are voting in minutes!

I know the Republican Congressional majority does not want to address this issue. A similar bill I co-sponsored last year never even got out of committee! This year, I am working to build public support to demand action:

On Saturday, April 30th, Congresswoman Stephanie Tubbs Jones and I held a town hall meeting in Cleveland, Ohio to hear from people who experienced first-hand the problems addressed by this bill. The record of this town hall will become an important part of our case.

Please join us. If you have already signed as a citizen co-sponsor, forward this e-mail to your friends and family. It's easy - just enter their email address(es) below:

Send to:

Help us continue to build the record by sending in your own reason for supporting the Count Every Vote Act. Perhaps you had an experience of your own on Election Day that demonstrates the reason why we need to pass this important bill. E-mail your story by typing it into the window below, then hit "send":



Your E-mail:
First Name:
Last Name:
Zip Code:
Share Your Voting Experience in 2004




Remember: we can't just talk about democracy around the world – we have to strengthen democracy right here at home!

Let's take action to demonstrate our faith in democracy, and make sure that we will be able to count every vote!

Sincerely,

Hillary Rodham Clinton

she is guilty of refusing to follow orders

Last week, the Upper management of Abu Ghraib was exonerated from any wrongdoing..
and this week... Lynndie England will do time
Rumsfeld, Wolfowicz, Rice, Ashcroft and B*sh are guiltier than Lynndie England
and her baby will go into foster care while she serves

______________________

Pfc. Lynndie R. England, the 22-year-old woman who became an infamous presence in the Abu Ghraib prisoner abuse photographs, pleaded guilty today to seven of the nine counts against her, under an agreement with military prosecutors.

Private England had faced up to 16 1/2 years in prison if convicted on all full nine counts, which included conspiracy, dereliction of duty, maltreatment and indecent acts. But one of her lawyers, Capt. Jonathan Crisp, said last week that Private England would enter a guilty plea at the pretrial hearing today on seven counts and then face sentencing by a military jury. The reduced charges carry a maximum sentence of 11 years.

Two people close to the prosecution have said Private England can expect to receive no more than 30 months in prison.

When the proceedings, at Fort Hood, Tex., resume on Tuesday, a military jury will be seated to hear evidence on sentencing. That phase of the proceedings is expected to last up to seven days, possibly including weekends, according to a statement from the Fort Hood public affairs office. The statement said Private England was charged with violations of the Uniform Code of Military Justice that occurred at the prison near Baghdad from October to December 2003.

At the hearing today, the judge, Col. James L. Pohl, rejected a defense motion to recuse himself. Captain Crisp, one of Private England's lawyers, had argued that it was not proper for Colonel Pohl to preside over her case because he had been involved in the other cases related to the Abu Ghraib scandal.

Captain Crisp said Private England's defense team would present evidence that she had a history of mental health problems and learning disabilities. He said her lawyers would also present evidence that another soldier, Spec. Charles A. Graner Jr., who military investigators say was the ringleader of the abuse and who was her boyfriend at the time, was a corrupting influence on her.

Private England, an Army reservist from West Virginia, was shown in photographs from the prison holding a leash around the neck of a naked and crawling Iraqi detainee. In other photos, she appeared grinning or giving a thumbs-up over naked detainees, holding a cigarette between her teeth.

She and six other soldiers implicated in the abuse were reservists with the 372nd Military Police Company based in Cresaptown, Md. Four have pleaded guilty in exchange for reduced punishments; one, Specialist Sabrina Harman, faces court-martial next month.

Mr. Graner was convicted and sentenced in January to 10 years in prison and dismissed from the military. He is in a military prison in Leavenworth, Kan. The seven soldiers have said they were following orders.


Nathan Levy reported from Fort Hood, Tex., and Christine Hauser from New York. Kate Zernike contributed reporting for this article.

Sunday, May 01, 2005

two families in the subway

as i was waiting for the train, i saw two white families, One a father with a suade jacket and backpack, clearly in his 40s with a professor look about him. Sitting next to a woman looking like a librarian. She was fawning over a 4 or 5 year old boy who had on a Baseball cap that said OXFORD dictionary across the front. He was active and using his imagination to tell stories to his mother and young woman in her early 20s.. As the train came, the two women got up to hold his hand.. His Nanny and his mother..

Left on the bench was another white woman, hunched over, with two children.. A female about 12 and a boy about 7-8, her skin was spotty and she held an open beer bottle in her brown paper bag, she was ignorning her son who was trying to ask her a question. She told him to sit down.... she looked tired...

Friday, April 29, 2005

Paul signac developes A horror of the dot .....

My friend Suzi who is a writer and art historian and i went to the Met to see the art work..
We visited the Master NeoImpressionists and we looked at the Dots dots dots...we read the descriptions and found that near the lovely paintings by Signac...that he developed a HORROR OF THE DOT....HOw can a pointillist have a HORROR of the DOT...
its just not right... since then we have referred to the HORROR of the DOT.. gotten a bad case of THE HORROR OF THE DOT... most recently called it A Horror O' the dot..

this season's haute couture is all about DOTs.. they are going to be everywhere...DOTS and DOTS and DOTS...

READ ON CHICKIDEES..... You too may get the HORROR of the DOT ....
____________________



Signac 1863-1935

Master Neo-Impressionist

Review by Johanna Garfield

If Neo-Impressionism were "a kind of religion, it would claim... Georges Seurat as its Messiah and Paul Signac as its Saint Paul," said one critic a century ago. Certainly, the names of the two are inextricably interwoven, with Signac known to many primarily as the follower and promoter of Seurat's "pointillism," exemplified in his best-known work, 'A Sunday on the Grand Jatte.'

Sometimes known as "divisionism" -- or more colorfully, "confettiism" -- pointillism was based on the juxtaposition of tiny dots ("points") of pure color, which Seurat felt the brain would involuntarily mix to produce a more brilliant and harmonious result than the muddy, overlapping strokes of the Impressionists. (Hence the term, "Neo"-Impressionists for Seurat and his followers.)

What the organizers of the retrospective at the Metropolitan Museum attempt to show is that Signac was a brilliant and innovative artist in his own right. And though some may disagree, I feel that in the huge exhibit of 120 works in seven chronologically organized rooms, they succeed.

The fact is that the young Signac, who quit school at 16 and proceeded to teach himself painting by studying the works of other painters, was more influenced by Monet than any other artist. The first gallery, which starts when Signac was twenty, covers the first two years of his artistic life in Paris (1883-1885), when he followed Monet's example and painted "plein-air" studies along the Seine.

At this time he was frequenting Montmartre cafés and literary soirées and was determined to become a progressive artist, avoiding the traditional Ecole des Beaux Arts. His striking 'Montmartre Study: Studio,' done when he was only twenty, with its pair of legs emerging from the right hand side of the canvas, and a candle in the middle that stands out from the light in the window, is strikingly modern in feel, despite the Impressionist brushwork. During these early years, he was also influenced by the then-Impressionist Camille Pissarro, whose cousin Berthe Robles he painted in his erotic l883 'The Red Stocking.' Ten years later, they were married.

Though he met Seurat in l884 and saw his monumental 'Bathers at Asnieres,' he did not immediately become his disciple. That occurred in l886 when 'La Grande Jatte' was the centerpiece of a room at the last Impressionist exhibition, which also included works by Pissarro and Signac himself. It was then that Signac took on the role of booster for the new movement, and as such was soon a prominent figure of the Parisian avant-garde.

His own style was immediately altered by his friend and colleague as well. His technique became more controlled and refined (see the transitional paintings of the 'Junction at Bois-Colombes'), and he even went so far as to go back to a Paris snow scene -- his only snow scene, incidentally -- to add dots to it. He was aware that his 1886 'Riverbend, Les Andelys' (Les Andelys was a suburb about 60 miles from Paris) and the other nine paintings he did there in the Neo-Impressionist style were a turning point. Such delightful if stilted works as 'Sunday' and 'The Dining Room' -- about which one reviewer said, "After the 'Grande Jatte' of M. Seurat we have the 'petit tasse' [little cup] of M. Signac" -- also show Neo-Impressionism's enormous impact on the young artist.

But in time Signac began to go his own way, both geographically and artistically. He visited Van Gogh, whom he admired (though he felt he could depict color more accurately himself) and began to explore areas untouched by Seurat. A passionate yachtsman, he spent his summers at coastal resorts and painted a dazzling series of seascapes that, though they still reflected Seurat's influence, also show his interest in modern themes, and in the connection between art and music. He began to assign opus numbers to his work and added musical tempos, such as 'Adagio' and 'Scherzo' to his titles.

With Seurat's sudden death in l891 from infectious angina (he was only 31) Signac increasingly followed his own vision. Just about halfway through the show is a dazzling portrait of his biographer and good friend, the critic Felix Fénéon. In this tour de force, Signac's humor -- the starburst of colors around Fénéon's head spoofs the "chromatic circle" then favored by painters -- as well as the influence of "japonisme" and pointillism, are all on display. But so is his very individual brilliance.

By the mid-1890s Signac had developed a horror of the dot for his own art, though he continued to champion Seurat and other Neo-Impressionists.
(He wrote an influential treatise on the movement.) He discovered St. Tropez in l892 and established his second residence there, far from what he described as "Paris and its so-called intellectual crap," though he retained ties to the capital as an outlet for his work.

Then, in 1892, he discovered the joys of watercolor. The ability to use brilliant colors quickly and spontaneously had a liberating effect, and the harbor scenes and other paintings from the last thirty-five years of his life are quite astounding. Some of the standouts are 'Flood at the Pont Royal,' (1926) with one of ghis favorite motifs, the bridge; the striking colors of 'Fishing Boats, Le Pouligen' (1928) and the richly patterned, mosaic-like 'The Tuna Boats, Groix' (1929).

The retrospective, which includes many other portraits, drawings, and a number of prints, should go far in countering Signac's reputation as simply the second man of Neo-Impressionism.Signac 1863-1935

missed opportunity dreams -gained opportunity dream

i woke from a fitful sleep with my cat lying across my body. the alarm clock hadnt rung..
this is what i remember. I was in the woods at a falcon ridge type place. i was among a group of people and i had a blanket, Ipod Earplugs and green sneakers. I was told that Dar is to be separated from Richard and I went to give another group my green sneakers.
i realized i was at falcon ridge and it was the tarp run for space that was beginning. I knew i had to go through the woods to a field which i did to see no one there... i had all the space but i chose to retract my steps and join the rest of the group and wait til the send off.. I realized that i didnt have fleece or a sweatshirt or something to keep me warm or any supplies. But i could call for them to be brought. I realized that i had driven in my car through the gates with NO TICKET. i saw a sound board type table with rare musical memorabelia like someone was selling or preparing to sell with the face and name of Mary Chapin Carpenter... I feel Lucky was what i saw on cardboard ready to be attached to a cd...
i then realized i missed an opportunity to place my tarp first before everyone else...the tarp run had begun and i was left behind and i had to take the left over space or find myself some space or make myself some space

and the alarm clock rang

Thursday, April 28, 2005

epstein barr update

i should be feeling depleted but i am not.. I have had a stressful few weeks and needed a time out of two days. I went to work this week and had a stressful city audit (that i passed with glowing results) and it was stressful getting there and beyond it.. the day after was worse... its also passover so my eating habits are different...

i am remarkably feeling well tonight even though i taught.. I am feeling rested and more like myself..

this EBV is as unprectible as the hot flashed i am getting...

i never know how i am feeling and when i will be drained.. i think friday nights are the worst when i havent had time to rest appropriately..

epstein barr update

i should be feeling depleted but i am not.. I have had a stressful few weeks and needed a time out of two days. I went to work this week and had a stressful city audit (that i passed with glowing results) and it was stressful getting there and beyond it.. the day after was worse... its also passover so my eating habits are different...

i am remarkably feeling well tonight even though i taught.. I am feeling rested and more like myself..

this EBV is as unprectible as the hot flashed i am getting...

i never know how i am feeling and when i will be drained.. i think friday nights are the worst when i havent had time to rest appropriately..

MaryLand, Spain and the Sound and the Fury

My friend Suzi has this BluePyramid Quiz on her Blog..so i did her friggin quizzes.. I always do her quizzes and here are my results to What STATE are you..(not what state are you in ) what country are you, and what book are you.
The first time i did it.. my country was ICELAND.. i guess its the polar opposite to South Africa...cool vs warm tropical..and when i did it the third time, SPAIN..
so pick your country... im a bit of all three....peaceful seems to run through all three





You're Maryland!

You enjoy contemplating your navel so much that you want to build a whole
school devoted to said purpose. You like Chevy Chase a ton as well, maybe even more than
Cal Ripken since he started doing those Century 21 commercials. Mostly, though, you want
to kick back, watch the ballgame, and eat crabcakes. Brick is by far your favorite
building material. You might even call yourself a brick house.



Take the State Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.






You're Spain!

You like rain on the plain, as well as interesting architecture and
a diverse number of races and religions.  You like to explore a lot, but sailing,
especially in large groups, never really seems to work out for you.  Beware of pirates
and dictators bearing bombs.  And for heavens' sake, stop running around bulls!
 It's just not safe!

Take
the Country Quiz at the href="http://bluepyramid.org">Blue Pyramid









You're The Sound and the Fury!

by William Faulkner

Strong-willed but deeply confused, you are trying to come to grips
with a major crisis in your life. You can see many different perspectives on the issue,
but you're mostly overwhelmed with despair at what you've lost. People often have a hard
time understanding you, but they have some vague sense that you must be brilliant
anyway. Ultimately, you signify nothing.



Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.





Wednesday, April 27, 2005

Capricorn Horoscope for week of April 28, 2005

Capricorn Horoscope for week of April 28, 2005

Verticle Oracle card Capricorn (December 22-January 19)
You may have trophies, merit badges, and plaques to commemorate your sexual accomplishments, Capricorn. You may have a PhD in tantra and letters from past lovers testifying to your excellence as an erotic partner. Nevertheless, I believe you have more to learn. There are frontiers you have not yet explored. And this is the perfect time for you to push to the next level. Open your mind and heart to the possibility that you're ready to upgrade the way you stir up emotion-enriching, soul-expanding bliss.

latesha 2

i was having my semi annual city audit and while i waiting for the audit, i knew my attention span was minimal so i took advantage of the time and cleaned my office. Monday, i saw Latesha in the office doing a whole lot of nothing... she is on spring break and staying with her cousin NOT her mom...

i asked if she could help me... she labled folders while i sorted paper and we filed stuff.. She and i talked.. She is an immature 17 year old in some ways.. telling me about things in her world.. her school, talking about her friends like i knew them.. She called their names like we talked about them before..younger teens do that more often..

then as i asked her to write DAS.. Designated Assessment Service, the program that i manage.. she asked about DAS...and explained she knew DAS and other kids she knows are clients of DAS..i asked if the group members she attends with are DAS or PINS kids.. She said NO DAS...their parents have AIDS.. i explained that social workers and social services agencies use acronyms and DAS also stands for Department of AIDS services.
she is a bright kid who knew the word acronym and is slated for calculus next year..

she explained that she was raised by her grandmother who died two years ago.. Her father died of AIDS when she was 7 and he was a DAS clients.. She was familiar with ACQC- Aids center of queens county.. she knew the impact of aids and saw the worst..
when her grandmother died, she had to go live with her mom.. She and her mom, who lives in a shelter and has a history of substance abuse and having her kids taken from her.. Latesha has been removed from her mom when she was young.. Latesha prefers to live with her grandmother but cant because she is dead..

i spent the morning with this young woman..she and i talked about blank discs and disc holders.. i knew she was interested in the ones i had and needed blank discs.. she said she gets em from school whenever she can... I handed her one and a disc case. and hten a spare disc.. She earned her discs..
it didnt feel like she was asking for payment or manipulating me to get there.. this is a kids who is skilled at getting what she needs from where she can...
i offered willingly... she hinted but didnt ask.. i could have refused the hint or shot her down...

this kids needs a team of people to go to bat for her.. or support her efforts. and i an be one of those people

Tuesday, April 26, 2005

friendsofhillary.com post 1

Dear Friend,

With so much at stake, Hillary is speaking out, and working with her Democratic colleagues. Here's an update:

Last week, she met with Michigan Governor Jennifer Granholm and Senators Debbie Stabenow (MI), Carl Levin (MI) and Jay Rockefeller (WV) to highlight the deep Medicaid cuts approved by the Republican House - cuts that would force states to choose between funding schools and funding hospitals. "The fight is far from over," Hillary said. "It is unconscionable to balance the budget on the backs of the vulnerable."

In honor of Equal Pay Day, on April 19, Hillary and Congresswoman Rosa DeLauro (CT) announced that they were introducing the Paycheck Fairness Act to strengthen equal pay laws and address the pay gap between men and women. "Equality works for all of us. Now is the time to make sure that we all work for equality," Hillary said.

This Monday, Hillary went to Wall Street with Senators Chuck Schumer (NY) and Ron Wyden (OR) to join members of the financial services industry in explaining the financial risks for individual Americans if Bush's privatization scheme succeeds. Hillary said, "As President Bush attempts to sell his plan to undermine Social Security, we are joined today by financial leaders who aren't buying it. ...They are joining the growing chorus of voices warning that privatizing Social Security is a bad deal for America's families."

And Hillary is speaking out against the "nuclear option," the Republicans' attempt to change the Senate rules by breaking them, in order to eliminate checks and balances and gain more power:

If invoked, the "nuclear option" would be, in my view, one of the most egregious abuses of power that the Senate has experienced in its history. ...[T]he majority seeks to turn the United States Senate into a rubber stamp for President Bush's extreme judicial nominees and force all Senators to abdicate our constitutional responsibility of advice and consent. As one sworn to uphold the Constitution, that is something that I cannot do and will not do and that is why I will continue to do all I can to fight for our democratic principles.

...President Bush has nominated a few people to serve on our federal courts for life that I and many of my colleagues believe would not abide by the rule of law, which is why some of these nominees were not confirmed. Now, to stack the courts with these nominees and other extreme judges, the majority is attempting to violate long-established and agreed to Senate rules in order to do away with a constitutional check on the power of the President to pick any judicial nominees he pleases. This is wrong and inconsistent with American values. ...I will do all that I can to ensure that this does not happen.

Please let us know if you would like more information on any of these issues or others that Hillary is working on. And thank you, as always, for being a Friend of Hillary!


Sincerely,


Ann F. Lewis
Director of Communications

swingers for social security

the social security swing votes rest with Republican Olympia Snow of Maine and Gordon Smith of Oregon. On the democratic side, the votes are with Kent Conrad of North Dakota and Blanche Lincoln of Arkansas

the gangsters seem to be same.. Republican... Hatch, Frist (who is out of his mind) Santorum ( who is the butt of many sexual jokes and even has a anal related sex act named after him by the readers of the Village voice sex column), Bunning, Crapo, Thomas, Lott, Kyl,

VS
Kerry, Jeffords (ind), Wyden, Rockerfeller, Bingaman, Kerry, Schumer

The chairs being REP Grassley of Iowa and DEM Baucus of Montana


Why do i feel like its about these white men keeping their jobs sometimes..

Im watching the social security vote carefully...When RR went to IRA, to augement Social Security, he told us.. the US government would spend our investments so take care of yourself..
the current administration IS spending our investments and wants us to do a better job than they are...

call your REpresentative...Im calling Olympia Snow and Gordon Smith today

Friday, April 22, 2005

poem o the day NYC

THE DRUM
by Nikki Giovanni

my father says the world
is a drum tight
and hard
and i told him
im gonna beat
my own rhythm

Thursday, April 21, 2005

poem o the day

Dont be polite
bite in
pick it up with your fingers and lick the juice that
may run down your chin.
it is ready and ripe now, whenever you are.

you do not need a knife or fork or spoon
or plate or napkin or tablecloth.

For there is no core
or stem
or rind
or pit
or seed
or skin
to throw away.

How to eat a poem by Eve Merriam

a dream in a matter of minutes

I woke after two days with a fever to know i was hearing..
Shawn Colvin singing "matter of minutes"

've been thinking
About you and me
Maybe I was just
Seeing what I wanted to see

You can call me crazy
But you know this time I swore
That I wouldn't run
But I can't do that anymore

I can't find a way to stay
And I can't see my way to go
But I can't give up without a fight.

I can pack myself up in a matter of minutes,
Leave you all far behind
All of my old world and all the things in it are hard to find
If they ever were mine

You've been trying
And I know it's been hard
And I'm afraid of
All this blood in my heart

If there's one thing certain
It's there ain't nothing for sure
And I want to run
But I can't do that anymore

I can't meet you half way
And I can't have it my way
And I can't give up without a fight

I can pack myself up in a matter of minutes,
Leave you all far behind
And all of my old world and all the things in it are hard to find
All of my old world and all the things in it are hard to find
Like they ever were mine

I could count the good times we had
On one hand
All the rest was
A sort of means to the end

Well not it's done
And I can never
Go back to where I was before
And I wanna run...

I can get myself clean in a matter of minutes
And get it wrong every time
All of my whole world and all the things in it are hard to, hard to find
Everything change in a matter of minutes
And nothing was saved in time
All of my old world and all the things in it are hard to find
But they never
never
never
were mine

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

the holiday of liberation

Passover or pesach or the holiday that celebrates the exodus of the jewish people from the oppressive Phararoh is upon us again.. Why is this year different than any other year? will be the question asked at the sedar table..

there are lots of differences this year.. Its our third year in Iraq at war.. oh those lies are the same lies.. they are just getting worse.. No weapons of mass destruction. lies of democracy.. same lies about the oil and a faux government.. same lies about christianization of america.. same lies about caring about the middle class or the poor..

so what makes this year different.. is it my EBV or my hot flushes ...

no what makes this year different is the amount of kosher for passover food in the markests.. when i was kid.. it was bad candy and matzah.. lots of matzah meal that was used for baking.. now it premade goods.. in the day it was the packaged mix of chocolate cake..that sucked.. now its bakery 7 layer cakes..it was elute chocolate bars and fruit slices of sugar.. now its candy galore .. when i was a teen it was ice cream and potato chips and then it was bakery items..
now its pizza, noodles, ff dressing, spagetti sauce.. cereal like cheerios..
its not passover, its a wheatless, barleyless, speltless, ryeless, week with substitute products..
i cannot buy these because it will not be passover for me..

my ancestors didnt leave egypt with pizza on their back... it was matzah..
the matzah is the basis for all foods passover.. so why does it have to painless..
the jews leaving egypt and travelling for 40 days and 40 nights did not have a painless time.. giving up foods, reminds us of hte pain they felt for our freedom..
so why make easy

freedom shouldnt be easy... just ask the Iraquis under US occupation.. freedom isnt easy.. so in this season of liberation.. i am liberating myself from packages passover foods... too bad the administration doesnt libertate the iraqui...
somehow "let my people go" applies today..

so i will remember moses and remember the exodus and pray for another type of exodus..

Capricorn Horoscope for week of April 21, 2005

Capricorn Horoscope for week of April 21, 2005

Drugs don't give Indian holy man Mangal Das a buzz. Maybe he has meditated too much to be affected by mere chemicals. In his quest for experience that takes him outside of his usual awareness, he has also arranged to be bitten by snakes and scorpions. Unfortunately, that doesn't give him a kick, either. He even tried drinking elixirs made from toxic herbs, but there was no bang to be had. Finally he found an intoxicant that worked: touching live wires. Now he enjoys getting an electrical shock every day. I wouldn't be surprised if you soon embarked on a comparable quest to expand your thrills, Capricorn. But please limit your search to things that are really good for you. Avoid the shock and poison options.

poem o the day 2

on MARIA dancing by robert lowell

How graceful maria leads the dance
she's life itself. I never saw a foot
so nimble and so elegant; it speaks
and the sweet whispering poetry it makes
shames the musicians

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

another sick day, another event

i have had a case of the flu, a fever and since sunday, i have been ill. i stayed home yesterday and last night, i napped on the couch and went to sleep at 9pm... i could not get up this morning and didnt...

though i am feeling better and have to run an errand... i got caught up in the Naming of a new pope... Somehow, i had CNN on and by chance.. not by design.. i looked up and there was a drift of white smoke.. earlier this week, i condemned CNN for showing a cut away of smoke stacks of black.. i knew i needed to watch the naming of a new pope.. NOT because i am catholic or care but it seems that there are major world events that occur while i am home sick.. the last major one.. was 9-11

i have memories of events i now cannot recall while being home from my job at St josephs.. a sick day was a rare event for me then.. and i remember watching tv ... i would get bronchitis and be homebound..

i am more liberal with my sickdays at CMS and even more so with EBV...
i am fluish this time.. with fever or hot flushes (who cant tell the difference)

i marked my pagentry of wellness with washing the sick sheets, the sweat laden sheets from when a fever breaks..

the rest of the world marks the pagentry of a new pope...

Poem O'the day

http://nyc.gov/html/poem/html/today/music.html

Make music with your life by Robert G O'Meally

Make music with your life
a jagged silver tune
cuts deepday madness
that you wear in to jewels

Carry 16 bars of old blues with you
everywhere you go
walk through azure sadness
howling like a guitar player

Monday, April 18, 2005

the attacks of hillary I

So just as the right wing attack machines have started gearing up to defeat me in 2006, we're sending a strong signal that we will be ready to fight back.

You may have seen stories about these "anti-Hillary" campaigns lately. As the New York Times said:

Arthur Finkelstein, the political guru who helped engineer the defeat of one Democratic luminary, Mario Cuomo, has his sights set on another: Hillary Rodham Clinton... His plan includes financing an advertising campaign against her similar to the one orchestrated by Swift Boat Veterans for Truth...

They're going to spend millions of dollars on personally negative attacks, hoping to keep me from speaking out on issues important to all of us, like protecting Social Security, the need to count every vote, and the dangers of the "nuclear option" that would end our democratic system of checks and balances.

Well, I have news for them: I am going to go right on, working hard and speaking out against the irresponsible, extreme policies of the Bush administration that I believe are leading America in the wrong direction.

from an email from friends of Hillary Rodham Clinton

Sunday, April 17, 2005

poem in your pocket too

like eddie, its national poetry month and NYC is celebrating with a poem in your pocket week again.. NOW i get eddie's small poem in his small pocket...


http://nyc.gov/html/poem/home.html

April is National Poetry Month. To celebrate this special occasion, the New York City Department of Education, in collaboration with the Office of the Mayor, Department of Cultural Affairs, City University of New York, and the New York Times, is co-sponsoring the third annual Poem In Your Pocket Day on Thursday, April 21, 2005. New Yorkers are encouraged to carry a poem in their pocket and share it with friends, family, coworkers and classmates. Public schools throughout the five boroughs will highlight poetry on this day through readings by CUNY poets, poetry workshops and specifically designed lesson plans. Tuck a poem in your pocket and see what surprises may come your way. What will your poem be?

Don’t forget to look for selected poems in The New York Times, April 17-21, leading up to this exciting event. Watch NYC TV for the latest information on Poem in your Pocket Day. Explore this site for a listing of poetry events being held throughout the City during the month of April, and for links to cultural organizations that can serve as sources for poems or other information about poetry.

Pick up your Poem in Your Pocket Bookmark at your local library, Coliseum Books or at a Borders bookstore near you!

the Sneetches world of dr suess

Dr. Seuss

The Sneetches


Now, the Star-Bell Sneetches had bellies with stars.
The Plain-Belly Sneetches had none upon thars.

Those stars weren’t so big. They were really so small
You might think such a thing wouldn’t matter at all.

But, because they had stars, all the Star-Belly Sneetches
Would brag, “We’re the best kind of Sneetch on the beaches.”
With their snoots in the air, they would sniff and they’d snort
“We’ll have nothing to do with the Plain-Belly sort!”
And, whenever they met some, when they were out walking,
They’d hike right on past them without even talking.

When the Star-Belly children went out to play ball,
Could a Plain Belly get in the game? Not at all.
You only could play if your bellies had stars
And the Plain-Belly children had none upon thars.

When the Star Belly Sneetches had frankfurter roasts
Or picnics or parties or marshmallow toasts,
They never invited the Plain-Belly Sneetches
They left them out cold, in the dark of the beaches.
They kept them away. Never let them come near.
And that’s how they treated them year after year.

Then ONE day, it seems while the Plain-Belly Sneetches
Were moping and doping alone on the beaches,
Just sitting there wishing their bellies had stars,
A stranger zipped up in the strangest of cars!

“My friends”, he announced in a voice clear and clean,
“My name is Sylvester McMonkey McBean. And I’ve heard of
Your troubles. I’ve heard you’re unhappy. But I can fix
That I’m the Fix-It-Up Chappie. I’ve come here to help
You. I have what you need. And my prices are low. And
I work with great speed. And my work is one hundred per cent guaranteed!”

Then, quickly, Sylvester McMonkey McBean
Put together a very peculiar machine.
And he said, “You want stars like a Star-Belly Sneetch? My friends, you can
Have them for three dollars each!”

“Just pay me your money and hop right aboard!”
So they clambered inside. Then the big machine roared.
And it klonked. And it bonked. And it jerked. And it berked.
And it bopped them about. But the thing really worked!
When the Plain-Belly Sneetches popped out, they had stars!
They actually did. They had stars upon thars!


Then they yelled at the ones who had stars at the start,
“We’re still the best Sneetches and they are the worst.
But now, how in the world will we know”, they all frowned,
“If which kind is what, or the other way round?”


Then up came McBean with a very sly wink. And he said, “Things
are not quite as bad as you think. So you don’t know who’s who.
That is perfectly true. But come with me, friends. Do you know
what I’ll do? I’ll make you, again, the best Sneetches on the beaches.
And all it will cost you is ten dollars eaches.”


“Belly stars are no longer in style”, said McBean.
“What you need is a trip through my Star-Off Machine. This
Wondrous contraption will take OFF your stars so you won’t
Look like Sneetches that have them on thars.”
And that handy machine working very precisely
Removed all the stars from their tummies quite nicely.


Then, with snoots in the air, they paraded about. And they opened
Their beaks and they let out a shout, “We know who is who! Now there
Isn’t a doubt. The best kind of Sneetches are Sneetches without!”

Then, of course, those with stars got all frightfully mad.
To be wearing a star was frightfully bad. Then, of course, old
Sylvester McMonkey McBean invited THEM into his Star-Off Machine.

Then, of course from THEN on, as you probably guess,
Things really got into a horrible mess.

All the rest of that day, on those wild screaming beaches,
The Fix-It-Up Chappie kept fixing up Sneetches.
Off again! On again! In again! Out again!
Through the machines they raced round and about again,
Changing their stars every minute or two. They kept paying money.
They kept running through until the Plain nor the Star-Bellies knew
Whether this one was that one or that one was this one. Or which one
Was what one or what one was who.

Then, when every last cent of their money was spent,
The Fix-It-Up Chappie packed up. And he went. And he laughed as he drove
In his car up the beach, “They never will learn. No. You can’t
Teach a Sneetch!”

But McBean was quite wrong. I’m quite happy to say.
That the Sneetches got really quite smart on that day.
The day they decided that Sneetches are Sneetches.
And no kind of Sneetch is the best on the beaches.
That day, all the Sneetches forgot about stars and whether
They had one, or not, upon thars.

Eddie my friend

Eddie is my friend. He is 5 years old and goes to preK..He recently became a big brother and doesnt like his brother. Eddie and I have known each other for a while. i ran into him on valentines day and had no candy. Eddie was off to the dentist to have a tooth removed. I gave him a dollar for the ice cream Man (see mr softee)

well i walked to school with eddie friday. He told me he was going to the high school on a field trip.. He told me that he had to put a poem in his pocket. As his pockets are small, it had to be a small poem. If he had larger pockets, he would have to write a larger poem.

i understood what Eddie meant....

i hope he wrote his poem...

it is national poetry month, aint it pokey?????

subway facination

i am facinated with the subway... I ride it all the time, i get on and get off.. i ride to manhattan from my home in brooklyn. i pretty much ride after school hours for the teenagers and parents who are picking up children from their schools or i ride at night, after ive been somewhere. I mostly ride on weekends. I have taken to looking at poeple's shoes on the subway, the perfunctory looking down.. til last week when i was bored..i looked at a man and knew what he looked liked as a child. I pictured him as child and then extended that to others around me..
Grown people and what they may have looked like as a kid..

sometimes, generally when i am riding home from my thursday night class, i tend to talk to someone... One night, a nigerian woman who has lived in paris for years. SHe talked of all the things that she didnt like about HOW nyers and americans live. How cramped we are and your need to work... rather than vacation. I asked her why she was still in ny, brooklyn no less and as she was a fashion designer, she felt that she would try to break her chops in NY. SHe told me about her sister who bought a cartier watch on canal street. It seems in france the confisgate knock offs. but this sister took this knock off to Cartier to get the battery replaced and the Park Avenue store confisgated it.

I meet many students and many social work students on the train. I see students reading books on computers, on chemistry, and me reading lectures, pamphlets and what ever else i can get my hands on.. I have talking to two social work students who complete an AA degree in a few months. These women never believed they would be the ones to go to college. Then there was a Lehrman student who was trying to apply the skills she was learning to a girls group with her church.

There are musicians on the train. A russian clarinetist who doesnt know Joni Mitchell's for free but will play a tune for loose change. the Homeless guys who represent themselves as a doo wop group and making a living, singing in harmony. There are players, buskers on the platform and on the train. Mexican bands who ride the train, peruvian flutists in the 14th and 34th street stations, the asian violist at 42nd, the hip hop dancers who tease tourists with their show.. the guitarist without all the strings on the guitar, julliard students at practice, and anyone else who wants to try to gain a coin

Last week coming home, i walked on the train after school. I was carrying too many bags and i saw a seat. So i took the seat and once i started reading my paper, i looked up and saw a sad eyed woman who was pregnant. I stood to give her my seat. None of the 8 men around me gave her a seat, but one man with a yamukle looked up from his ny times and stood to let me have his seat. I thanked him. Within seconds, i heard the man next to me talking to himself, under his breath. I looked at him and he needed to wash his shirt where he spilled food and needed to learn to maintain his hygiene. I knew he was travelling back to where he was living, i wanted to believe it was group home for the mentally ill. this man was high functioning but needed help. He carried a newspaper and more in his black plastic bag..
as we pulled into a station, he put his bag in the seat and go up and went to the door. He used the bag to reserve his seat but i thought that he didnt know that
leaving a bag unattended was not an acceptable thing in NY anymore. Even i who doesnt think of terrorist activity was concerned by his actions. He came back to sit down..
as the men across the way go off, i went to sit next to the pregnant woman..
"when are you due, ?" i asked. She looked at me and finally told me she was not pregnant. I was not sure i heard her correctly.. She was not pregnant.
She told me she has a tumor.. she hadnt had it removed. There was problem with her medical insurance and when the doctor told her there was a chance they would grow back. she didnt persue the surgery. This information was in response to some questions i asked her.. She will hve the surgery in july. she didnt know if they were fibroid and she didnt know much about her health or health care. She wasnt aware she had choices and it wasnt my place to tell her.
I apologized for thinking she was pregnant. She said that the tumor was in her womb as big as a baby . I asked her how hard it was to carry around that much weight. she said she gets very tired. She explained she wanted a seat but saw i had lots of bags so she appreciated i gave her my seat. I told her that she looked like she needed to sit so it was not a hard choice for me..I wished her well as she got off at her stop....

Riding the NY subway is always an adventure waiting to happen

Saturday, April 16, 2005

poem'd da day

April is Poem Month and My literary and literate friend suzi is posting a poem of the day... while i prefer Carl Sandburg, Robert Lowell, Dr Suess etc and other such poetry.. She is posting Adrienne Rich and other comtemporary poems.. For her Poem O' the day....
I told her that where i spend my time... its not poem of the day... or poem o the day.. it would be poem da da day...
Here is my crooked tribute to her POem O the day...
as tribute to the teenagers who read ghetto lit, who listen to the poets of their generation..who write rhyme or rap verse....

Album: The Eminem Show (2002)
Song: White America

Intro
America! We love you! How many people are proud to be citizens of this beautiful country of ours? The stripes and the stars for the rights that men have died for to protect
The women and men who have broke their necks for the freedom of speech the United States government has sworn to uphold. (Yo I want everybody to listen to the words of this song) or so we're told...

Verse 1
I never would've dreamed in a million years I'd see, so many motherfuckin' people who feel like me
who share the same views and the same exact beliefs, it's like a fuckin' army marchin' in back of me
So many lives I touch, so much anger aimed in no particular direction
just sprays and sprays and straight through your radio waves it plays and plays, till it stays stuck in your head for days and days
who woulda thought, standing in this mirror bleachin' my hair, with some peroxide, reachin for a t-shirt to wear
that I would catapult to the forefront of rap like this? How could I predict my words would have an impact like this
I must've struck a chord, with somebody up in the office, cuz Congress keeps telling me I ain't causin' nuthin' but problems
and now they're sayin' I'm in trouble with the government, I'm lovin' it, I shoveled shit all my life/and now I'm dumping it on...

Chorus (X2)
White America!
I could be one of your kids
White America!
Little Eric looks just like this
White America!
Erica loves my shit
I go to TRL, look how many hugs I get

Verse 2
Look at these eyes, baby blue, baby just like yourself, if they were brown Shady lose, Shady sits on the shelf
but Shady's cute, Shady knew Shady's dimples would help, make ladies swoon baby, ooh baby! Look at my sales
Lets do the math, If I was black I would've sold half, I ain't have to graduate from Lincoln High School to know that
but I could rap, so fuck school, I'm too cool to go back, gimme the mic, show me where the fuckin' studio's at
When I was underground, no one gave a fuck I was white, no labels wanted to sign me almost gave up, I was like
Fuck it, until I met Dre, the only one to look past, gave me a chance, and I lit a fire up under his ass
helped him get back to the top, every fan black that I got was probably his in exchange for every white fan that he's got
Like damn, we just swapped. Sittin' back lookin' at shit, wow, I'm like my skin is it starting to work to my benefit now?

Chorus (X2)

Verse 3
See the problem is I speak to suburban kids who otherwise would of never knew these words exist
whose moms probably woulda never gave two squirts of piss, till I created so much motherfuckin' turbulence
straight out the tube, right into your living room I came, and kids flipped when they knew I was produced by Dre
That's all it took, and they were instantly hooked right in, and they connected with me too because I looked like them
that's why they put my lyrics up under this microscope, searchin' with a fine tooth comb, its like this rope
waitin' to choke, tightening around my throat, watching me while I write this, like I don't like this (Nope)
All I hear is: lyrics, lyrics, constant controversy, sponsors working round the clock, to try to stop my concerts early
surely hip hop was never a problem in Harlem only in Boston, after it bothered the fathers of daughters starting to blossom
so now I'm catchin' the flack from these activists when they raggin', actin' like I'm the first rapper to smack a bitch, or say faggot
shit, just look at me like I'm your closest pal, the posterchild, the mother fuckin' spokesman now for...

Chorus (X2)

Outro
So to the parents of America
I am the derringer aimed at little Erica, to attack her character
The ringleader of this circus of worthless pawns
Sent to lead the march right up to the steps of Congress
And piss on the lawns of the White House and replace it with a Parental Advisory sticker
To spit liquor in the faces of in this democracy of hypocrisy
Fuck you Ms. Cheney! Fuck you Tipper Gore! Fuck you with the freest of speech this divided states of embarassment will allow me to have, Fuck you!
I'm just kiddin' America, you know I love you...

parking angels prayer

thank you parking angels for making parkings spots at places where my life will be easier and less stressful. THank you parking angels for those spots in front of venues when i have to carry the merch, thank you for allowing venues to let me park in their lots, thank you for the open meters and legal spots, the broken meters where i dont have to pay and can park as long as i need. and thank you for the late night spots close to my house so i dont have to drive around and around and can get home with ease

Monday, April 11, 2005

Chronic Fatigue Syndrome: Defeat Fatigue

treating chronic fatigue

symptoms and treatment of chronic fatigue

Viva la Manhattan- the isle of joy

Summer journeys
To Niag'ra
And to other places
Aggravate all our cares.
We'll save our fares.
I've a cozy little flat
In what is known as old Manhattan.
We'll settle down
Right here in town.

We'll have Manhattan,
The Bronx and Staten
Island too.
It's lovely going through
The zoo.
It's very fancy
On old Delancey
Street, you know.

The subway charms us so
When balmy breezes blow
To and fro.
And tell me what street
Compares with Mott Street

In July?
Sweet pushcarts gently gliding by.
The great big city's a wondrous toy
Just made for a girl and boy.
We'll turn Manhattan
Into an isle of joy.

We'll go to Greenwich,
Where modern men itch
To be free;
And Bowling Green you'll see
With me.
We'll bathe at Brighton
The fish you'll frighten

When you're in.
Your bathing suit so thin
Will make the shellfish grin
Fin to fin.
I'd like to take a
Sail on Jamaica
Bay with you.
And fair Canarsie's lake
We'll view.

The city's bustle cannot destroy
The dreams of a girl and boy.
We'll turn Manhattan
Into an isle of joy.

We'll go to Yonkers
Where true love conquers
In the wilds.
And starve together, dear,
In Childs'.

We'll go to Coney
And eat baloney
On a roll.
In Central Park we'll stroll,
Where our first kiss we stole,
Soul to soul.

Our future babies
We'll take to "Abie's
Irish Rose."
I hope they'll live to see
It close.
The city's clamor can never spoil
The dreams of a boy and goil.
We'll turn Manhattan
Into an isle of joy.

We'll have Manhattan,
The Bronx and Staten
Island too.
We'll try to cross'
Fifth Avenue.
As black as onyx
We'll find the Bronnix
Park Express.

Our Flatbush flat, I guess,
Will be a great success,
More or less.
A short vacation
On Inspiration Point
We'll spend,
And in the station house we'll end,

But Civic Virtue cannot destroy
The dreams of a girl and boy.
We'll turn Manhattan
Into an isle of joy!

Lady is a tramp by Rogers and Hart

Writer(s): rodgers/hart

She gets too hungry, for dinner at eight
She loves the theater, but doesn’t come late
She’d never bother, with people she’d hate
That’s why the lady is a tramp

Doesn’t like crap games, with barons and earls
Won’t go to harlem, in ermine and pearls
Won’t dish the dirt, with the rest of those girls
That’s why the lady is a tramp

She loves the free, fresh wind in her hair
Life without care
She’s broke, but it’s o’k
She hates california, it’s cold and it’s damp
That’s why the lady is a tramp

Doesn’t like dice games, with sharpies and frauds
Won’t go to harlem, in lincolns or fords
Won’t dish the dirt, with the rest of those broads
That’s why the lady is a tramp

Is it a slow news day.... The Presidents IPOD

White House Letter: President Bush's iPod
By ELISABETH BUMILLER

Published: April 11, 2005

WASHINGTON

Between his return on Friday from Pope John Paul II's funeral in Rome and his meeting today with Prime Minister Ariel Sharon of Israel, President Bush spent an hour and a half on Saturday on an 18-mile mountain bike ride at his Texas ranch. With him, as usual, was his indispensable new exercise toy: an iPod music player loaded with country and popular rock tunes aimed at getting the presidential heart rate up to a chest-pounding 170 beats per minute.

Which brings up the inevitable question. What, exactly, is on the First iPod? In an era of celebrity playlists - Tom Brady, the New England Patriots quarterback, recently posted his on the iTunes online music store - what does the presidential selection of downloaded songs tell us about Mr. Bush?

First, Mr. Bush's iPod is heavy on traditional country singers like George Jones, Alan Jackson and Kenny Chesney. He has selections by Van Morrison, whose "Brown Eyed Girl" is a Bush favorite, and by John Fogerty, most predictably "Centerfield," which was played at Texas Rangers games when Mr. Bush was an owner and is still played at ballparks all over America. ("Oh, put me in coach, I'm ready to play today.")

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The president also has an eclectic mix of songs downloaded into his iPod from Mark McKinnon, a biking buddy and his chief media strategist during the 2004 campaign. Among them are "Circle Back" by John Hiatt, "(You're So Square) Baby, I Don't Care" by Joni Mitchell and "My Sharona," the 1979 song by the Knack that Joe Levy, a deputy managing editor at Rolling Stone in charge of music coverage, cheerfully branded "suggestive if not outright filthy" in an interview last week.

Mr. Bush has had his Apple iPod since July, when he received it from his twin daughters as a birthday gift. He has some 250 songs on it, a paltry number compared to the 10,000 selections it can hold. Mr. Bush, as leader of the free world, does not take the time to download the music himself; that task falls to his personal aide, Blake Gottesman, who buys individual songs and albums, including Mr. Jones's and Mr. Jackson's greatest hits, from the iTunes music store.

Mr. Bush uses his iPod chiefly during bike workouts to help him pump up his heartbeat, which he monitors with a wrist strap. The strap also keeps track of calories expended for the intensely weight-focused president, who has recently lost eight pounds after eating a lot of doughnuts during the 2004 campaign. Mr. Bush burned 1,300 calories on his bike ride on Saturday, Mr. McKinnon reported.

As for an analysis of Mr. Bush's playlist, Mr. Levy of Rolling Stone started out with this: "One thing that's interesting is that the president likes artists who don't like him."

Mr. Levy was referring to Mr. Fogerty, who was part of the anti-Bush "Vote for Change" concert tour across the United States last fall. Mr. McKinnon, who once wrote songs for Kris Kristofferson's music publishing company, responded in an e-mail message that "if any president limited his music selection to pro-establishment musicians, it would be a pretty slim collection."

Nonetheless, Mr. McKinnon said that Mr. Bush had not gone so far as to include on his playlist "Fortunate Son," the angry anti-Vietnam war song about who has to go to war that Mr. Fogerty sang when he was with Creedence Clearwater Revival. ("I ain't no senator's son ... Some folks are born silver spoon in hand.") As the son of a two-term congressman and a United States Senate candidate, Mr. Bush won a coveted spot with the Texas Air National Guard to avoid combat in Vietnam.

Meanwhile, Mr. Levy sized up the rest of the playlist of the 58-year-old president. "What we're talking about is a lot of great artists from the 60's and 70's and more modern artists who sound like great artists from the 60's and 70's," he said. "This is basically boomer rock 'n' roll and more recent music out of Nashville made for boomers. It's safe, it's reliable, it's loving. What I mean to say is, it's feel-good music. The Sex Pistols it's not."

Mr. Jones, Mr. Levy said, was nonetheless an interesting choice. "George Jones is the greatest living singer in country music and a recovering alcoholic who often sings about heartbreak and drinking," he said. "It tells you that the president knows a thing or two about country music and is serious about his love of country music."

The songs by Mr. Jackson indicate that the president "has a little bit of a taste for hard core and honky-tonk," Mr. Levy said, adding that both Mr. Jackson and Mr. Jones "are not about cute and pop, and they're not getting by on their looks." And while Mr. Chesney "is about cute and pop and gets by on his looks," Mr. Levy said, "he's also all about serious country music."

Mr. McKinnon, who has downloaded "Castanets" by Alejandro Escovedo and "Alive 'N' Kickin' " by Kenny Loggins into Mr. Bush's iPod, said that sometimes a presidential playlist is just a playlist, nothing more.

"No one should psychoanalyze the song selection," Mr. McKinnon said. "It's music to get over the next hill."

Bush's Playlist

Published: April 11, 2005

A sampling from President Bush's iPod; some songs were selected by Mark McKinnon, the chief media strategist in the 2004 campaign:

John Fogerty, "Centerfield"

Van Morrison, "New Biography," "Brown Eyed Girl"

John Hiatt, "Circle Back"

Alan Jackson

George Jones

Alejandro Escovedo, "Castanets" Joni Mitchell, "(You're So Square) Baby, I Don't Care"

The Gourds, "El Paso"

Blackie and the Rodeo Kings, "Swinging From the Chains of Love"

Stevie Ray Vaughan, "The House is Rockin' "

James McMurtry, "Valley Road"

The Thrills, "Say It Ain't So" The Knack, "My Sharona"


THE LORAX speaks

Here is the link to the story of the Lorax
The lorax is short little guy who tries to tell the people in his world that they are using up all the resources and when the resources are gone and depleted, they will not be able to survive. The lorax is not crying wolf or whistling dixie

the lorax by dr seuss

HAPPY EARTH DAY.... Happy Earth... Listen to the lorax....

Free Plants and Trees for Charity



i have been a fan of this website but i live in a NYC apartment therefore I cannot take advantage of this offer. I have thought that i would love to gift a friend a Plant or Tree and donate to the disabled at the same time

Maybe you can buy a plant or tree?

Saturday, April 09, 2005

Poetry month

Peter, Peter, Sugar Eater

by Bruce Lansky
Peter, Peter, sugar eater,
always wanted food much sweeter.
Adding sugar was a blunder.
Now he is a toothless wonder.

Blow Your Nose!
by Bruce Lansky
Little Boy Blue
please blow your nose.
It drips like a faucet
and sprays like a hose.
Your brother and sister
are getting upset,
so please blow your nose-
'cause you're getting them wet!

Little Miss Muffet
by Bruce Lansky
Little Miss Muffet
sat on a tuffet
eating her curds and whey.
Along came a spider
who sat down beside her.
And since she was still hungry, she ate the spider, too.

London Bridge
by Bruce Lansky
London Bridge is falling down,
falling down, falling down.
There's no way to walk to town.
Take the ferry.

Mary Had a Little Jam
by Bruce Lansky
Mary had a little jam;
she spread it on a waffle.
And if she hadn't eaten ten,
she wouldn't feel so awful.

Yankee Doodle in Paris
by Bruce Lansky
Yankee Doodle went to France,
With his golden VISA.
But he could not afford to buy
Da Vinci's Mona Lisa.