In thinking about becoming 45, i think about growth and development and maturity and how i have reinvented myself with every decade. My 20s working hard to prove that i can become independant and work on the career that i studied for. I spent many years of my twenties making up for the adolescence i missed out in my teens. I made mistakes and was able to prove to be competent and mastered skills that would lead me to my 30s..
i remember being 28 and realizing that i had grown up and that i was an adult, though i have had adult responsibilities since i was young
My 30s were full of finding myself at that place on the career ladder that i thought was success at the time. I reached for the top of the career path and cruised through my late 30s..Til i decided that a change was in order and stopped smoking..
i hit the glass ceiling and wasnt busting through and didnt want to but i had to leave a place where i had been since i was 24, i had to leave a place that taken me from crayons from perfum. so it was hard and took some help (therapy) but i was able to move on... I saved myself by moving on..
this physical and emotional change caused many changes to come.. One biggest one was leaving that job and going on to another that has brought me much more. IN the end of my 30s, i redefined how i wanted to live, how i wanted to be and how i wanted to interract with others, how i wanted to give and how i wanted to get.
My 40s have been full of freedom and i have gotten better at being me and gotten to know me better.. I accept the warts and i think im having more fun now..
being 45 takes on new and complex paradigms but i will keep on the path that i am on only with a little more ME..
i need to add a little more me...
